Lessons a year on…
Written just before I was about to attend my 4th Prosperous Coach Intensive, in LA, October 2014
A Year on...
With a little over a week until what will be my 4th Intensive, I have been reflecting on what I have learnt since my first Intensive back in September 2013. I thought I’d share with you
1. No one wants to buy from a hypocrite. I was a hypocrite. I wanted to have my prospects invest in coaching when I wasn't prepared to make that kind of investment myself. It was not until I hired my own coach immediately after that intensive that I really experienced the power of this. Before then I had dabbled with coaching, I had hired coaches on a one-off basis, but that was not what I wanted my clients to do. Asking my clients to invest in coaching when I wasn't willing to invest myself was like trying to tell my clients that Romeo & Juliet by Dire Straits is the greatest love song ever (which, of course, it is!) without actually listening to it myself.
2. Coaching is an apprentice-based profession. That’s not to say you need to invest in a specific coaching apprenticeship, but it is a profession learnt from other professionals. My own mastery as a coach has excelled by both being coached by other masters at the game and by my own continued practise. Just like any apprenticeship I needed to do the time. Over the last year I have invested in my own coach as well as experienced coaching by many of my peers, and it has been invaluable.
3. All 18 disciplines in The Prosperous Coach will help you become a professional coach. However, one is absolutely mandatory to be a Prosperous Coach: “Discipline #18. Be great at what you do—not just good.” Working with the other disciplines will help you become a professional prosperous coach, but it’s so true that “being so good they cant ignore you” is the most powerful principle in creating a prosperous practise. We can work on our connections, our invitations, our proposals and all other aspects of client creation, but it’s serving and providing value that has people buy. Through all the noise of client creation I made a commitment that I wanted to give my clients the most powerful coaching experience they had ever had, and that is a continuous process of mastery to which I remain fully committed. As Michael Neill says - ‘Make Great coffee!’
4. However much I tell myself that my financial ‘requirements’ (aka needs) will not impact my coaching, the universe seems to have other ideas. At the times I have needed money client creation has not flowed as sweetly as the times when I am more financially secure. I have had spells where 2 clients have signed in one week when I really didn't need the money at the time. If you need money, go make money. Release your need for money from coaching.
5. No one is better at being me than me. Whatever I do and whatever I think, how ever much I compare, this will always be true. And as luck would have it, the most powerful and unique coaching experience for my clients comes from me being me! How cool and convenient is that!(I am constantly reminded of a Robert Holden quote here: ‘No amount of self improvement can make up for a lack of self acceptance’)
6. There are many many things I can always get better at, mastery is a never ending game, it is a process. I’ve come to accept that I can always get better, and to get on with being the coach I am today. There’s always another book to read, another seminar or training to attend. That’s the beauty of this profession, we get to continuously improve.For quite some time I was searching for that one single thing, that one magic bullet that would free me and enable to me to thrive at coaching. I realised I was looking for something that did not exist. And of course, I guarantee that as long as you look for something that doesn't exist you will never find it! I was on hold. If there is a magic bullet it is this: Imperfect action. That’s it! Action. I know of no better way of creating change in the world than taking action. Even spiritually enlightened people have to take action to earn a living. Who’d have thought, eh?
7. Everything that keeps me from action is noise. Absolutely everything. I can ask questions that have me put life on hold, I can ruminate and ponder forever. I can listen to the water-cooler guy in my head telling me lots of shoulds and shouldn’ts. It’s all just noise. The more I ignore the noise (and take action) the less noisy it gets.
8. Sometimes I want to give up. Sometimes I look back at my corporate career and long for that financial reliability and predictability. Then I wake up again and I know that too is noise. I am in love with coaching, literally. I bring love, in love, to my coaching. It IS me.
9. Mastery is a long, long, long game. It’s an infinite game. Everything is a long game and when I put off things that I think are just way too long for my immediate financial desires I get to look back on those decisions of inaction 6 months later and kick myself a little for not taking action when I originally thought. Be forever planting seeds. If we look a little deeper at the most ‘successful’ coaches out there we see that some have been at this game for 20 years or more. This is not an overnight game.
10. It’s so easy to see people as being way more successful than they actually are and indeed thinking that means something about me. It really doesn’t. Facebook tends to be most people’s highlight reel. And those that are successful have been through pretty much everything I have. They may be further down the road than me. That road may not be right for me. Comparison sucks. It sucks action out of life.
11. This community kicks-ass. Like any community, including the community that will assemble at the Intensive in LA next weekend, what we get out is directly proportional to what we put in. This also includes communities of two, my client and me, my coach and me.
12. Nothing contributes greater to my success than my willingness to screw up! As soon as I am willing to fail I cannot fail. I just take action and sometimes get to chuckle at the unexpected results.
13. A year ago I was a struggling coach. At times I still tell myself I am struggling, but today I see it as noise. I am making a living from coaching full-time. A year ago I would have scoffed at making $40,000 worth of proposals in one week, yet I did that in the first few days of this month. I always want more, want to do more, achieve more, serve more, and my own coach reminds me to pause, slow down, and celebrate the little victories that I achieve every week. There are always victories to be had. There is always something to celebrate.
14. Finally, when I think I am stuck, there is always something I can do that I haven't done yet. “But only every time”
If you’ve read this far, thank you and I hope this is useful to you. I am so looking forward to seeing all of you who will be at the Intensive next week. Please do come and say Hi. I am still that reserved British guy at heart, but it’s a big heart!
Loving you,
Phil
With a little over a week until what will be my 4th Intensive, I have been reflecting on what I have learnt since my first Intensive back in September 2013. I thought I’d share with you
1. No one wants to buy from a hypocrite. I was a hypocrite. I wanted to have my prospects invest in coaching when I wasn't prepared to make that kind of investment myself. It was not until I hired my own coach immediately after that intensive that I really experienced the power of this. Before then I had dabbled with coaching, I had hired coaches on a one-off basis, but that was not what I wanted my clients to do. Asking my clients to invest in coaching when I wasn't willing to invest myself was like trying to tell my clients that Romeo & Juliet by Dire Straits is the greatest love song ever (which, of course, it is!) without actually listening to it myself.
2. Coaching is an apprentice-based profession. That’s not to say you need to invest in a specific coaching apprenticeship, but it is a profession learnt from other professionals. My own mastery as a coach has excelled by both being coached by other masters at the game and by my own continued practise. Just like any apprenticeship I needed to do the time. Over the last year I have invested in my own coach as well as experienced coaching by many of my peers, and it has been invaluable.
3. All 18 disciplines in The Prosperous Coach will help you become a professional coach. However, one is absolutely mandatory to be a Prosperous Coach: “Discipline #18. Be great at what you do—not just good.” Working with the other disciplines will help you become a professional prosperous coach, but it’s so true that “being so good they cant ignore you” is the most powerful principle in creating a prosperous practise. We can work on our connections, our invitations, our proposals and all other aspects of client creation, but it’s serving and providing value that has people buy. Through all the noise of client creation I made a commitment that I wanted to give my clients the most powerful coaching experience they had ever had, and that is a continuous process of mastery to which I remain fully committed. As Michael Neill says - ‘Make Great coffee!’
4. However much I tell myself that my financial ‘requirements’ (aka needs) will not impact my coaching, the universe seems to have other ideas. At the times I have needed money client creation has not flowed as sweetly as the times when I am more financially secure. I have had spells where 2 clients have signed in one week when I really didn't need the money at the time. If you need money, go make money. Release your need for money from coaching.
5. No one is better at being me than me. Whatever I do and whatever I think, how ever much I compare, this will always be true. And as luck would have it, the most powerful and unique coaching experience for my clients comes from me being me! How cool and convenient is that!(I am constantly reminded of a Robert Holden quote here: ‘No amount of self improvement can make up for a lack of self acceptance’)
6. There are many many things I can always get better at, mastery is a never ending game, it is a process. I’ve come to accept that I can always get better, and to get on with being the coach I am today. There’s always another book to read, another seminar or training to attend. That’s the beauty of this profession, we get to continuously improve.For quite some time I was searching for that one single thing, that one magic bullet that would free me and enable to me to thrive at coaching. I realised I was looking for something that did not exist. And of course, I guarantee that as long as you look for something that doesn't exist you will never find it! I was on hold. If there is a magic bullet it is this: Imperfect action. That’s it! Action. I know of no better way of creating change in the world than taking action. Even spiritually enlightened people have to take action to earn a living. Who’d have thought, eh?
7. Everything that keeps me from action is noise. Absolutely everything. I can ask questions that have me put life on hold, I can ruminate and ponder forever. I can listen to the water-cooler guy in my head telling me lots of shoulds and shouldn’ts. It’s all just noise. The more I ignore the noise (and take action) the less noisy it gets.
8. Sometimes I want to give up. Sometimes I look back at my corporate career and long for that financial reliability and predictability. Then I wake up again and I know that too is noise. I am in love with coaching, literally. I bring love, in love, to my coaching. It IS me.
9. Mastery is a long, long, long game. It’s an infinite game. Everything is a long game and when I put off things that I think are just way too long for my immediate financial desires I get to look back on those decisions of inaction 6 months later and kick myself a little for not taking action when I originally thought. Be forever planting seeds. If we look a little deeper at the most ‘successful’ coaches out there we see that some have been at this game for 20 years or more. This is not an overnight game.
10. It’s so easy to see people as being way more successful than they actually are and indeed thinking that means something about me. It really doesn’t. Facebook tends to be most people’s highlight reel. And those that are successful have been through pretty much everything I have. They may be further down the road than me. That road may not be right for me. Comparison sucks. It sucks action out of life.
11. This community kicks-ass. Like any community, including the community that will assemble at the Intensive in LA next weekend, what we get out is directly proportional to what we put in. This also includes communities of two, my client and me, my coach and me.
12. Nothing contributes greater to my success than my willingness to screw up! As soon as I am willing to fail I cannot fail. I just take action and sometimes get to chuckle at the unexpected results.
13. A year ago I was a struggling coach. At times I still tell myself I am struggling, but today I see it as noise. I am making a living from coaching full-time. A year ago I would have scoffed at making $40,000 worth of proposals in one week, yet I did that in the first few days of this month. I always want more, want to do more, achieve more, serve more, and my own coach reminds me to pause, slow down, and celebrate the little victories that I achieve every week. There are always victories to be had. There is always something to celebrate.
14. Finally, when I think I am stuck, there is always something I can do that I haven't done yet. “But only every time”
If you’ve read this far, thank you and I hope this is useful to you. I am so looking forward to seeing all of you who will be at the Intensive next week. Please do come and say Hi. I am still that reserved British guy at heart, but it’s a big heart!
Loving you,
Phil